Nigeria at the World Cup: A Kaitanamous Journey

30 06 2010

Need A Lager?

So what was everyone expecting?

That we’d storm into the World Cup (that we just barely qualified for), and instill fear into our opponents just by our “sheer might”, or for the fact we’re playing on African soil?

I mean, I wish that was the case, but unfortunately, it comes down to basics of any competition, training & preparation, the latter which we were found to be wanting. There are countries that ‘obviously’ prepared for 4 solid years for this (fancy Japan eh?), and we hire a coach, one who has never coached outside his home country before, months prior to kick-off, and expect him to perform wonders? Is he a magician? Jor o!



101 Uses of the Vuvuzela

Going back to the ‘supposed’ home advantage; this vuvuzela issue, one that has brought about many an argument amongst my friends over its use. Person “A” would say, “The vuvuzela? Why it creates a unique ambience for the World Cup”.

Person B would say, “The vuvuzela? For a whole 90mins? Are they blowing it in turns?”

I would eloquently say, “This vuvuzela sef…the one that everyone is blowing it, who is supporting who sef?”

It’s during such times that we Nigerians get creative, and it’s always funny how we find humour in dire situations. When Nigeria was playing Argentina in our first game, and as Argentina scored, I received this message,

“If you want Nigeria to win this match, repeat these Yoruba incantations

‘OHHHHH-biribiri l’oju n ri, ?bo bo l’aguntan n wo, ko ba’le ko ba’le ni labalabafi n wo’gbo lo, ?MESSI oooooooooooo, ?TEVEZ oooooo, HEINZEooooo, ?oya e maa sun!!!’ “

Also during Kaita’s Kaitastrophic error against Greece that got him a deserved Kaita-card, the jokes started raining in,

“‎​Kaita: kaitus a person whose presence in a team has no impact but his absence brings about disarray, confusion and paralysis”


A special mention goes out to Yakubu Aiyegbeni, the jazz that you use to get into the 1st team every time, and continually break Nigerian hearts, is very strong. Kudos. Also a mention for Danny Shittu for getting into the squad in ‘peak physique’

Yakubu "Agege Bread" Aiyegbeni

Danny "Fatty-Bom-Bom" Shittu

Other special mentions go out to Kanu Nwankwo, who has served the side selflessly, and put on a brave display of skill in our final game against South Korea. Also Peter Odemwingie, who continually shows dedication both on and off the field, and I belief should be a strong candidate to captain our side.


I would also say that they only person that showed up, and equally saved us from humiliation of ‘North Korean proportions’ (see them against Portugal, and you’d understand), was our No. 1 Shot Stopper Vincent Enyeama hands...literally!

Anyway, no disrespect to few players who tried to show up and play with purpose, but Football is a team-sport, and no matter how fantastic they may be as individuals, if they can’t play as a team, they can’t progress.

Preparation is key.

We can’t keep riding luck you know?

Enthusiastic Much?